Fallen
by Crimson Creature Izumi
Summary: I figured I should just bury it all, but how could I bury the dead when one of them were standing right in front of me. . .
1. Chapter 1

Fallen

Disclaimer: I don't own Cowboy Bebop

His death was coming. I knew it. How? I don't know, maybe something in those damn eyes of his. . . I hated it. Always . . . Julia . . . Yeah, she was beautiful; blonde hair and blue eyes. She was a strong woman too, but I just don't see why they fought over her.

Two men; one filled with hate, and the other filled with the bad love of a lost lover . . . And then they fought. Over the death of the blue eyed beauty. Killed, both of them. For a while, I went somewhere in my mind; Spike was there, vicious was there. But that was short lived.

I don't quite know when was it that I fell for the cold eyed demon, but I did. I'm still falling, now that I think of it. Was it the way he grabbed me, the way he talked so casually in the presence of a dead man? Who knows. . . And Spike. The broken space cowboy. Was it our constant fights? Maybe the way he never paid me the slightest bit of attention. God, who fucking knew.

I figured I should just bury it all, but how could I bury the dead when one of them were standing right in front of me. . .

It was Saturday and I was off. It had been a year since I left the Bebop and I was done with the gambling thing. I got a job and a new name. I'm now Sioux Love, ha ha. But anyways, I was enjoying myself, sitting at the window with a cup of tea.

It was raining in the sad little town. Water ran down the red bricks of the complex. It was kind of like home, mars, with its green grass and fresh air. Though the only grass I really saw was the kind you find in the cracks of the sidewalk, or the dead kind in the parks; not anything like the grass of my memory.

I was looking out the window when I saw him looking right up in my direction. I was so surprised I almost dropped my tea. . .almost. . . Shit, I paid _money_ for that cup.

I stared at him, he stared at me. My heart hurt. Everything he wore was soaking wet, from the black over coat, to his long silver hair. His arms hung limply at his sides. It was like he was looking directly at me in my fourth story window.

I blinked, but he was still there. . . Just . . . Staring at me. It kind of gave me the creeps after a while. I got up and put my cup in the sink, and when I came back. . . He was gone.

I thought he was going to come up and kill me. . . But. . . There was that look in his eyes. He looked like he had words unsaid; stuff he wanted to get out, but didn't.

I couldn't deny my feelings for him though. I loved his cold demeanor. I kept remembering back to the time he had kidnapped me. It was really nothing, but when I was all tied up and scared, he had tucked a strand of hair behind my ear and told me I wouldn't be hurt if the plan went right. . . Hump, most likely a lie, but I liked the way he said it, nonetheless. At least he pretended to be polite.

I waited for hours for. . . Hm, I don't know. . . Him to come up and knock on my door? It finally happened at around 8:00pm.

I looked up, from the book I had been reading, at the sound. . . Three more wraps. . . I opened the door and there he stood, freshly shaved and dry. He wore a black suit with a black tie, and his hair hung loose at his shoulders. He didn't speak at once.

I touched the side of his face, "Well, it's about time"

His eyes drifted to my hand and he placed his over mine. His skin was so cold that it surprised me. His eyes were on me again, like ice crawling through me. I took my hand away.

"come in," I said

I heard the door click shut and then the heavy bolt shift. I sat at the window and looked out. I thought briefly of how this all came to be.

"I was trying to bury you," I said

When I didn't hear an answer I looked over at him. He was standing in the middle of the room. He had taken off his coat; it was draped over his arm. He had on a shiny black dress shirt, real nice.

"So what exactly are you doing here?"

"I don't know"

He had the voice of a ghost. It was airy and disconnected. Was he going to kill me? It Didn't really matter.

"Do you want to kill me?"

"I've had a million chances to kill you"

"But you never did"

"No"

"Why'd you kill Spike?"

I felt myself choking up. . . How pathetic.

"I didn't"

"Ha, yeah right"

"He shot me first. . . I almost died"

I shook my head, I already knew how it went down. After all those near death experiences, Spike had to die like that. . . But it was only natural. He died for Julia. . . Julia. . .

"What about Julia?"

"She. . . Has become one of the fallen"

"Why don't you cut the shit," I was getting mad

"I had her killed"

"Humph"

I had had enough. Enough of Julia, enough of Spike, enough of death. I knew the basics, but what I really wanted to know was why he was here, in my apartment, talking to me.

"What do you want with me?" I asked, "I'm not that important"

"I want you," he said

I laughed, "Did Spike shoot you in the head?"

A sly smile crept up his face. I've always wanted him. But him wanting me? That was rich.

"What? Do you want to fuck me?" everyone did

"Oh, I want to do more than that"

I smiled and walked to him, wrapping my arms around his shoulders and pressing my body against his. He just looked down at me, and I felt it again. It was like he was pouring ice into me though his eyes.

I pushed him away, "You- I-"

He steadied himself, "Yes?"

"I just want to know why you came to me?"

"You were the only one who didn't fear me"

I went to the sink.

Something caught my eye. A spider; crawling across the counter. Its little legs moved fast over the counter top. I looked away.

"We are the same, you and I"

I turned to him, "Yeah? How's that?"

"We both loved people who betrayed us"

I looked back to the sink. The Shining surface. I had to keep asking myself why he was here. He didn't need anything from me. . . He obviously didn't want to kill me. . .

"So you did love her"

"Yes"

"I never loved Spike"

"You lie"

"How could I?" I said, "He was. . . Such a. . . lunkhead"

Thoughtful sadness crept into me; remembering our fights.

"So he's dead too"

"yes"

"Humph"

I couldn't talk about him anymore. I might've cried. I tuned and leaned against the sink, looking at him. He was so damn gorgeous with his hair hanging carelessly around his shoulders.

"Well, who cares why you're here anyway," I said, "You're here"

He put his coat on the couch and came to me. He caressed the side of my face.

"Yes, I'm here"


	2. Chapter 2

Fallen

Disclaimer: I don't own Cowboy Bebop

It wasn't that hard to track her. . .Sioux Love. . .Faye Valentine. . .

Basic things. I hired a hacker and found that she had changed her name. . . Started a new slate. . .Was it all of the death? Had she stepped through the fallen into a world of new struggle?

The killing had taken its toll on me. All of the faces came back in flashing blurs of gore. I've seen too much, done to much. . .I was coming out of the cold, my fragile skin being exposed to the warmth of the morning sun. . . After so many nights.

I no longer looked at life as totally meaningless; rather, I found that it was meaningless in a sense of all its sorrows. What was the point of living when there was nothing to live for?

I asked myself this question as I lay near the point of death on the floor of the Syndicate. . . And no, thoughts of Faye didn't motivate me to get up and drag myself to the hospital. . . No. . . She came much later. . . After the madness.

It was the fact that it wasn't my time to go. . . I lie on the floor for what seemed like an eternity, willing myself to die, but it simply didn't come. I bled and bled, but death wouldn't take me.

I knew months had passed before I came back to myself. I lived in a dream state, I suppose. I behaved as humans do, but I wasn't there mentally. And it was funny how it happened. . . The awakening. . . I was walking through the streets, going nowhere in particular.

. . . The expression on her face as I burst through the catheradral doors from Spike's grenade. . . So frightened. . . Afraid I was after her? And I laughed. Hysterically. People stared, but I didn't care. I laughed to myself all the way back to my hotel room.

So then. . . I went to see the subject of my interest. I gathered my connections and found her. . . On mars. . . Of course. . .

It was raining that day. I watched her hurry along, trying to keep dry. A strand of damp hair stuck to her lips. How long had it been? A year? And I looked at her looking at me through her high window. . . Without fear. . . I knew I wanted her then.

- -

I dressed and went to her apartment. It was in ruins, her neighborhood . . . But what wasn't these days? I stood outside her door for a moment before knocking; listening to the shuffling noises from within. Hm. Was she pacing?

We talked . . . About nothing. Nothing but the past, the dead, and the reasons of my being there. . . It seemed she talked in circles. She was under the impression that I wanted something from her.

In truth , I wanted her warmth. I had only tasted a fraction of it as I lay dying. . . I saw light in her. She'd seen too much in her time, but she hadn't let it take away her will to live. . . I had dined with corpses, laughed with them, and even slept with them.

They, like myself, had let life bleed them out. How could I ever expect the dead to love me. . . Broken spirits only love the light. . .

She eventually decided that I wasn't one of the "bad guys" any more, and gave in. . .

I wanted to touch her so very badly. I wanted to feel the warmth in her supple skin. . . I touched her face. She welcomed it, a bit startled by the temperature. I wanted to touch her all over. . . Feel her soul; embrace it. . . Take it?


	3. Chapter 3

Fallen

Disclaimer: I don't own Cowboy Bebop

I woke to the rays of sun, coming through my window. I looked down. The covers where in a jumble from last night. . . Last night. . .

I didn't bother feeling for his form next to mine because I knew it wasn't there. He took me gently; licking my tears away, touching me in a way no other had ever touched me, caressing my soul. . . But I knew he wouldn't stay 'till morning.

Forcing myself, I looked to the empty space next to me, which wasn't so empty after all. . . There was a single red rose on the pillow.

I picked it up, delicately running my fingers across the petals.

"Love?" I whispered

I was confused again. Of all the things he could have left on my pillow(don't think to hard, lol) why'd it have to be a _red_ rose? The color of love. . .

I needed a shower. . . Afterward, I gathered the sheets and covers up from the bed, threw them in the laundry basket, and put on fresh sheets and blankets. . . Had to do laundry anyway. . .

I made my way down the stairs to the laundry room on the ground floor. I tripped twice on the way, cursing the landlord for not hiring a maintenance crew to fix the damn building. . .

It was cool and stuffy in the laundry room, with the faint smell of mildew and soap in the air. I tossed my load into one of the few functioning machines, put in two woolongs, and pressed the 'start' button. The company didn't work today, so I was just going to rest up.

I sat on one of the dryers and lit a cigarette. It was comforting. . . Sunday, sitting on a dryer, watching the sun come up.

"Hey, no smoking in here!"

I jumped and turned to the sound. . . It was the landlady. Old, fat woman with an attitude.

I took another puff and exhaled, "Fix this shit building first," I said

She raised an eyebrow, " If it's so bad, then why don't you just move out?"

"Whatever"

I dropped the cigarette on the floor, jumped off the dryer, and put it out.

"That's more like it," she said

I walked past her and went back up to my apartment. . .

I opened the drapes to let the sun in and looked out the window. . . I was searching for him, a looming figure in all the sunshine. I didn't find him, of course.

It made me wonder. . . Was it all just a dream that I had? Did I dream up that whole day. Was today really Saturday and not Sunday? I looked at the calendar. ; April 16, 2074. . . Sunday.

It wasn't fair. Every time I tried to live normally, some jerk had to come along and ruin it. . . And this jerk not only ruined my normality, but he hurt me. No matter how much I denied it, I didn't want to be left alone.

"FINISH WHAT YOU STARTED YOU BAST-"

There was a knock on the door.

"WHAT?!"

A pause. . . A very long pause. . . I ran to the door and jerked the knob, finding that it was locked. Unlocking the door -more pissed of than I already was- I wrenched it open to find the jerk standing right in front of me.

I didn't know how to react. . . My face contorted and I forced myself not to cry.

"What's wrong with you?"

My voice sounded rough.

He looked tired. . . Why the hell did he look tired if he left so early this morning?!

"I went for a walk," he said

"A _walk_?" I was confused "What the- ugh!"

He touched my face, " I've just come back in to the world"

I exhaled and turned away, "Don't _ever_ leave me alone. . . I can't take it."

"Where you worried"

"No. . . I just. . . Don't know how to take it all. . . I thought it was a fucking dream"

He didn't say anything, so I turned to face him. He did look tired. What time did he leave? I touched his lips. . . Soft.

"You look tired," I said "Come sit with me?"

He followed me to the couch and removed his coat before sitting. I took it from him and flung it over the arm of the couch gently guiding his head to my lap. He lay on his side.

I could feel his breath on my thigh.

"A red rose, huh"

I guess I fell asleep because it was noon when I opened my eyes. I looked down to see that he was still asleep. I stroked his hair and he inhaled. . . Guess he wasn't asleep after all.

He layed his hand on my knee for a while. I smoothed his hair back.

He sat up and closed his eyes for a few seconds before turning them on me. He look almost innocent in a way. There was no hunger or lust in his eyes at the moment. . . Just observation, and. . . _Something else. _

It kinda made me shy to look at him. Me? Shy? Guy had to be doing something. . . I looked away.

"What?"

He gently turned my head to me, "I want to stay here"

"What? This apartment?" I said, "Make yourself at home"

A smile crept up his face, and he put his hand on my chest.

"No," he said, "In your heart"

I was completely dumbstruck. No one ever said that kind of thing to me before.

". . . Okay," I said stupidly, "Sure"

"Good," he whispered, stroking my hair

I was thinking a lot of things at this point. Things like 'When's it going to end' or 'He's lying', but I didn't let them get to me. If I was just now being presented with this opportunity, what were the odds of it happening again?

So I just gave in. No remorse. . . What ever happened would happen, I guess.


End file.
